A Dozen Things I Hate...I mean, Dislike

I'm grumpy today...ok, I'm grumpy MOST days, but today, I feel like blogging about it.

1. I hate when I'm driving the speed limit down Hwy 198 (two lane highway that is under construction and lined with huge oak trees) and the car behind me is trying to crawl into my trunk. Seriously? Apparently they haven't had a speeding ticket lately, because if they knew how much it cost, they would be driving the speed limit, too. I got one last year and it cost me nearly $400...therefore, I will forever drive the speed limit. Also, I value my life and the life of my children. I don't especially want to risk a head on collision at 70mph. Don't get me wrong...I know what's it like to be in a hurry. I'm ALWAYS in a hurry...to get to my destination. Not die.

2. I hate when my kids are in a bad mood and I have to drive for 30+ minutes, down a two lane highway with someone riding my butt, and they're screaming the entire time. Literally screaming. Trust me, if I weren't already a grump, this would make me one! And if I wasn't driving, I'd be drinkin'! OMGee...we got a new car so we would have enough room for all of us and it's still not enough room to give me peace when I'm driving. I'm going next week to have one of those privacy windows installed. What a dream that would be. Picture it, for just a second. You're driving and your kids are all in the back screaming and beating the crap out of each other and you don't even care because you can't hear a thing. Ahhhh...Don't try to tell me that's not appealing to you. It's appealing to any human mother, I can almost guarantee it.

3. I hate when Sirius Satellite Radio goes and changes all it's station numbers. What the heck is that about? I went to turn on Radio Disney (yeah, it's one of my faves), and instead I got CNN News! CNN? Really? They could have at least made it Fox news. Where are all my faves now? I can't find The Blend or The Pulse, either. I ended up listening to a preview of where all the new stations were!! How flippin' irritating is that?

4. I hate when I'm suppose to have a Vault Denim party and my kids are all here making lots and lots of noise. Singing and dancing and sounding like they're going to come through the ceiling. I would try to drown them out with the radio, but I don't know where any of my stations are!! So, I guess I get to listen to Big Time Rush. Oh well...they're cute. Have you seen those boys? Holy cow. Don't worry...they're all over 18, so I can say that.

5. I hate the thought that if those Big Time Rush boys heard me say that about them, they'd probably do a little baby barf because this "old" lady thinks they're hot. Yeah...I said it! H-O-T!

6. I hate that I have a new "hobby" selling jeans and suddenly all I hear is crickets chirping. {{Chirp-chirp. Chirp-chirp.}} Oh, and have dust in my mouth because all my friends have taken off running and left me eating it. Nice. Thanks. Thanks for nothin'!! ~I would like to say a special thank you to those who have supported me, though. I really do appreciate it.~ But seriously. I'm not asking you to donate a friggin' kidney!! Just come by my house and look at some friggin' jeans!! You don't even have to buy anything! You don't even have to book a party. Just come by. Have a brownie (and if takes "special brownies" to get you here, I'm not opposed*) and hang out. At least make an effort to see what it is I'm doing! I swear some of them are just making up excuses. I feel defeated.

7. I hate when I'm trying to blog and the kids should be in bed and I keep thinking Tim is going to put them to bed, but instead they're all running around like banshees (is that the word I'm looking for?). OR I think he's got them to bed and then realize they're all in MY bed. I guess, technically he gets that one, because they are in bed, but their own beds would be nice.

8. I hate when I'm about lose it so I take a little sumpin'-sumpin' (which, for the record I only do once or twice a year. And only when I know I won't be driving, but I can't take my best friend because she makes me so sleepy) and it gives me stupid heartburn.

9. I hate heartburn.

10. I hate that people copy and paste crap into their facebook status. Sorry, but it really does annoy me. With this whole Bin Laden thing...ugh. One person says, "Don't spread hate, yada yada~MLK" and the next says, "Obama didn't kill him, blah blah blah...". A cover band has to be really good for me to like them. Same goes for your status. They'll never be as good as the original.

11. I hate that some people are on facebook and they don't update their status or comment on anything at all. Those, my friends, are called "lurkers". Don't tell me you don't find it just a little creepy when someone you didn't even realize was still active on facebook, walks up to you and says, "So, how's your kid feeling?".I don't know about you, but I tend to forget that there are other people that can read my status because I only have a few regulars on my homepage (which is another thing I hate, but I'm not going to mention that). OK, so technically, it's our fault for putting all that stuff out there on facebook (or this blog perhaps), but it's still creepy. If you're a lurker, don't say anything and remain anonymous. It's better for everyone.

12. I hate when certain people make me feel like I can't be myself around them. I'm not sophisticated. I don't have a college education. I'm a stay at home mom. I shop for my clothes at Target (except for my jeans, of course). That's who I am...why do I feel the need to be prim and proper when I'm not. I'm just NOT. That doesn't mean I don't use manners. But I do like to wear my ripped jeans and flip flops, and during the winter, I like my wool socks and ugly Sanuks**. I like big, roomy, sweat shirts and often go without make-up because I just don't feel like putting it on (that, and also because I'm just naturally beautiful and it's just a shame to cover it up). I like to sit on the couch with my feet tucked up under me. I eat fast and A LOT (just ask Tim. He hates to take me out for dinner because I eat more than him. So not joking). And I don't care how much the wine costs, if it tastes good and takes the edge off, I'll drink it. Awww, heck! Who am I kidding...it doesn't even have to taste good.

13. I hate when it takes me 3 hours to write the blog and another 2 hours to edit. When is someone going to start paying me for this?!?!? Anyone?

Ok, so it was a baker's dozen, but they're always better.

*I'd just like to state for the record, that I am opposed to "special brownies". I do not promote the consumption of "special brownies" in anyway. Honest and for true. I was just saying that to get a laugh. Did it work? Oh, nor do I promote the use of the word hate so much...but it fit here.

**I'd also like to state for the record, that I realize I am very critical of what other people wear...however, when one chooses to wear grossly, ill-fitting clothes, they're setting themselves up for some criticism.

Ahhhhh...I feel so much better.